This weekend, the Bananas take over The K

Come, Mr. Tally Man, tally me banana

Bust out your brightest shades of yellow when you head to Kauffman this weekend—the Savannah Bananas take over the stadium this Friday and Saturday, bringing to Kansas City their own brand of baseball.

Well, technically, the Bananas don’t play baseball. They play Banana Ball. What’s the difference, you ask? Well, before we get to the rules of mastermind Jesse Cole’s potassium-heavy creation, let’s check on Lydia and her family’s dinner party:

Alright, back to the Savannah Bananas. If you’re going this weekend, or you’re going to watch on YouTube (I believe all their games stream for free), you’re going to notice that this is different from regular old baseball. And these differences aren’t so little. They’re so big, in fact, that I, and others, consider Banana Ball completely different from baseball.

First, there’s a time limit. During a recent Banana Ball broadcast, a stat flashed across the screen for the pitcher on the mound: MPI. Turns out that’s shorthand for Minutes Per Inning. See, once the first pitch is tossed, a Banana Ball game lasts only two hours. That means that no inning will start once the two-hour time limit has been reached. If no team has reached five points—that’s right, points; more on that shortly—the game moves to the Showdown Tiebreaker.

Let’s go back to that whole “points” thing. There are still runs in Banana Ball, just like baseball, but it goes like this: say Bananas’ opponent scores three runs in the top of the first inning, but the Bananas manage a grand slam in the bottom half of the frame. 4-3, right?

Nope.

Instead, it’s 1-0 Bananas. In the second inning, runs revert to 0-0. This way, every inning counts. The first team to five points wins.

Back to the Showdown Tiebreaker, possibly the most unique rule of Banana Ball. If the score is tied after the two-hour time limit, then the pitcher, with only the catcher and one infielder, faces the batter. There’s only one out until the next team bats. If the batter strikes out, that’s that. If the batter puts the ball in play, then the fielder must prevent the batter from rounding the bases and scoring a run, which here automatically equals one point. This continues until one team outscores the other.

The other six rules are different from baseball, but not nearly as radical, though some are downright hilarious. For example, bunts are forbidden. If a player bunts, he’s kicked out of the game. Harsh but fair.

Batters cannot step out of the batter’s box. Do that, it’s an automatic strike. There’s a time limit, people! That’s also why mound visits are not allowed.

Here’s a weird one—batters can steal first base. What in the name of Sam Hill? Well, if there’s a pass ball or wild pitch on any pitch of the count, the batter can take off for first. Similarly, there no walks, but Sprints. On ball four, the batter takes off for first with the ball dead until every defensive player (excluding the pitcher) touches it, at which point it becomes a live ball. The batter can take as many bases as possible until the ball becomes live.

Lastly, in order to get the crowd involved, if a foul ball hit into the stands is caught by a fan, that’s an out. If you’re rooting for the Bananas, then, think twice about catching that foul ball.

It’s worth noting that the teams also execute choreographed dances during the game as well as “trick plays.” The dances and trick plays aren’t rules but are encouraged.

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As I wrote earlier, you can watch any Savannah Bananas event on the team’s YouTube page for free. Right now, you can go there and watch past games, too. Additionally, the team recently reached an agreement with ESPN to air numerous games this summer (though not the ones in Kansas City).

If you want to learn more about the history of the team, Jesse Cole has written several books, but the one specifically for the Bananas is Banana Ball: The Unbelievably True Story of the Savannah Bananas. It’s a quick read, too.

A few weeks ago, CBS’ 60 Minutes delved into the Bananas with a segment by Lesley Stahl. It’s well worth the 13-plus minutes.

Then there’s the Bananas team mascot, Split, who’s worth a follow on X. The King of Potassium is fond of trolling his team’s haters, which can get pretty funny.

For contrarian sakes, here’s an article over at Defector, where the author argues that the Bananas make baseball boring.

I couldn’t disagree more.

The Savanah Bananas don’t play baseball. They play Banana Ball, something distinctly different.

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I’ll be at the game Saturday night. I’m looking at this as a one-time event. Banana Ball isn’t going to replace baseball—that’s not its goal. Look at it as an evening of entertainment at the home of the Royals while they’re facing the Twins up north.

Last Halloween, my oldest son dressed up as a monkey, so of course I purchased and wore a full-body banana outfit. He chased me around the neighborhood. His costume also came with a fake banana, which at one point he dropped on the sidewalk. I dropped to my knees beside it and hollered, “BROTHER!”

My wife didn’t seem amused, but it cracked up our boys as well as several passersby.

Anyway, I’m trying to decide what to wear to the game—that outfit or a Hawaiian shirt covered in bananas.

Please help.